What is love? | Question page.xyz

Love is the most powerful feeling of human beings. Love is understanding, accepting, giving, giving, caring, valuing, and living together. Through love, we can share good things with people around us. Love is the power to drive us to do anything for the good of others.

Love is intangible that induces strength, peace, tranquility, joy, and well-being in the human being. Love is the total inspiration to each consequent act to be happy, and as a value, it is a strong emotional inclination towards a person. It is noble and the most dynamic force that we can have to propel us towards any kind of good that we know.

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Love as value

It is considered as a feeling, and it is the most human and sublime value of all because for it to be cultivated, the compendium of many others is needed. It is universal and must be shared and sought by all, where it will always tend to the good.
Love is one of the most powerful and curious values ​​that exist. It is one of the most powerful because it is delivered according to how much is received. If a child grows up without his parents' love, he grows up with negative values ​​and probably with resentment towards the society around him and towards the world.

Just as he did not receive love, neither will he give it. Love is a seed that sows the assimilation of the rest of the values, and without love in life, what can come out of it?

On the other hand, if that same child experiences the unconditional love and care of parents and the stimulation that appreciation causes, that same child will have the essential foundations to behave virtuously and contribute positively to the world.

Therein lies the importance of giving love and living with it, it is the superior force that manages to correct and eliminate the inferior negative forces. The more love we have to give to the world, the more positivism we sow in it.

By loving people who are not loving to us, we teach the right treatment in our society and encourage others to improve with the appreciation we honestly give them.

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Then what is love?

A little, a lot, passionately, madly ? Who does not remember having stripped the daisy trying to overcome the dreadful doubt as to the love of the beloved or the beloved? Who does not remember the emotions of the first love born at 14, 16 or 18 years old? How could the proximity of the chosen one make us capsize and dream for hours ... even before having spoken to him? We were in love with The Love.

The first outing, the first kiss, the first promise, the first caress, the first dreamed project together. He was so wonderful; she was so beautiful; nothing existed without him; the future was not possible without her. Our love was pure and everlasting. We were transforming the world, had the most beautiful children and we lived happily ever after. Nothing could stop us. Except...

Except ... the first heartache. What tears and sobs! How could he do this to me? I never imagined she could be like this. What a great void creates the first pain of love! What a pain in the stomach and stomach the loss of a loved one can cause. What depression! And just before sinking completely, there comes ... a new love.

We will always remember with nostalgia our first teenage loves. And how the learning of love could have been strewn with pitfalls, but also with indescribable pleasures and joys. Until finally the rare pearl arrives and we take the plunge: we promise to love each other always, for better or for worse.

However, according to official statistics, only two in ten couples confirm the conclusion of romance novels or films: did they get married, (today) had two children and live happily? We all know accomplice couples who have loved each other since their teenage years, who studied together, who have beautiful children and who seem to be made to spend the rest of their lives together. But we know more couples who, oh! surprise, have divorced. In fact, five in ten marriages today, according to figures from the World Health Organization, result in divorce. And three out of five couples stay together, for better but especially for worse, no longer talking to each other or arguing even in residences for the elderly.

What makes successful couples who walk and go through the years? Could there be a magic formula or miracle within the reach of all? What makes some people never seem to have problems with their love affairs and others always seem ready to get depressed and wanting to kill themselves after a heartbreak? People appear happy, with or without stable partners; others cling to the first comer or the first who does not know how to say no.

Much has been written on the difficulties of love. Hundreds of books demonstrate how often love is consumed like a drug and, of course, when the drug is lacking, symptoms of withdrawal occur, both physical and psychological.

But what is love?

They say love is an emotion. Little Robert tells us that an emotion is: a movement, an agitation, an emotional reaction, in general intense. Love would therefore be a movement towards someone. How can two people in motion, towards each other and in their respective lives, make this reciprocal movement last through the vicissitudes of life together?

In my opinion, there are three essential conditions for the sustainability of love: admiration, dreaming and sexual desire. And these three components must be channeled to the same person. And reciprocal. And stable. But not necessarily in order: desire can arise from admiration or vice versa.

I can only love someone if I admire them and feel admired by that someone. Admiration is a feeling of joy and fulfillment in front of what one considers beautiful or great (little Robert). There is love only in respect. From the moment we shout nonsense at each other, we seriously mortgage love. We may not always agree on raising children, how to spend the money (these are the two main sources of disagreement) ..., but we must always agree that the other is a unique human person worthy of respect and admiration. Let's not forget that two lovers are also two intimate enemies ... who owe each other respect. The decline in admiration parallels the decline in love. Hence the importance of standing in front of your partner.

Two people who love each other share the same projects, the same dreams; they are two accomplices who plot their future together: the purchase of the first house or the first car, the arrival of the first child and the following ones, the professional successes of one or the other, social involvement, holidays, retirement ... Again, individual dreams are not necessarily the same and should not necessarily be subordinate to the dreams of the couple, but from the moment when personal dreams take over, or even from the when I catch myself dreaming with another, the end of the common dream is near. Any couple is based on two autonomous people with their own respective projects. To love each other is to dream together of possible things.

Obviously, love is based on mutual physical attraction. So much so that the act of love designates sexual relations. What is more wonderful than having sex with your loved one? To love someone is to want to stick together, touch each other, caress each other, interpenetrate, merge. But, it is also to maintain one's desire and the desire of the other by keeping a certain distance. You are not me and I am not you. One plus one is not one, but three, i.e. you, me and us. Love at first sight cannot survive passion, for total fusion kills desire. I only want what I don't have, not what I have. You also exist outside of me and I exist outside of you. Distance is necessary for desire and allows rapprochement to turn into pleasure.

Does this mean that a sexual difficulty or a loss of libido means a loss of love? Sometimes, but not always. However, it is a clue that something is happening with one or the other or in the dynamics of the couple that the couple must take care of as soon as possible if they want to survive. Need to be alone, to speak, to be listened to, to go together far from children and work, to rest, to find a new common dream, to find the admirable being that I am and that the other is , to readjust our respective movements and torque.

It is true that the heart has reasons that reason does not know, but reason can teach the heart which direction to take and how to recognize the warning signs of a loss of breath of emotion. Lasting love, we cannot repeat it enough, is made up of passion and reason, heart and mind. But love also requires effort to cope with duration and routine.

Living together is not an instinctive behavior. We must learn to live together, just as we learned to walk, speak, write, ride a bicycle, drive a car, do our job, etc. But ... where are the teachers ???

Love is ...
Give flowers for no reason.
Love the other, especially with makeup removed.
Do the little something that makes the difference between being good and being great.
Put his nose in the other's pillow when he's gone.
Accept the importance of a temporary distance.
Finding it nice to do the dishes because we're together.
Knowing how to laugh together, each other.
Call, say I love you, and hang up.
Touch the aura of the other, without touching him physically.
See yourself with new eyes, every day
Take the other's razor without getting quibbled.

A love story, when it begins, is lived in the mode of magic and enchantment. We would like to believe that she is still unique and mysterious. Yet, on closer inspection, love, like most feelings, also has its laws.

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How does it feel to be in love?
She is waiting for his coming. He will be there tonight at nine o'clock. Very close to her. She takes a bath, hums. She feels her heart beating. Strong. She's happy ; she is in love. Mad with love. She thinks of her big eyes, her body, her mouth, her smile ...

“Expectations, oh delights, expectations from the morning and throughout the day, expectations of the hours of the self, delicacies all the time; to know that he would arrive tonight at nine o'clock, and it was already happiness. She is Ariane, the young wife of Adrien Deume, a lackluster civil servant working at the League of Nations. He is the lover, Solal, the hierarchical superior of her husband. He finds her beautiful, attractive, original. To seduce her, he temporarily gets rid of Adrien Deume by sending him on a mission abroad. He then succeeds in subjugating the young woman with a dazzling statement. It is the beginning of a mad passion.

Belle du Seigneur (1968) is one of the most beautiful romance novels ever written. We come out dazzled, shaken, upset. It is a hymn to love even if it ends in tragedy. Albert Cohen describes the intoxicating delirium of the early days of a passionate love. Unable to part with it, Solal fled with Ariane to the Côte d'Azur. In their hotel room, then in a villa, Belle-de-Mai, they experience sublime moments. "O that complicit joy of looking at each other in front of others, the joy of going out together, the joy of going to the movies and shaking hands in the dark, and looking at each other when the light came on, and then they would go back to her house to to love each other better, he proud of her, and everyone turned around when they passed, and the old people suffered from so much love and beauty.

The state of love - particularly during its initial phase ("in the nascent state") - can be identified by characteristic symptoms. Anthropologist Helen Fisher conducted the survey of young Americans and Japanese. A clinical picture emerges, showing a few constants.

Focusing attention first. When the other is there, nothing matters. “They were for each other the whole universe”, writes Friedrich von Schlegel, in Lucinde (1799). This exclusive attention is accompanied by a search for fusion, ("I would like to merge into him / her"). When he is absent, the loved one arises in the head of the lover in the form of intrusive thoughts. This is the second characteristic of the state of love ("I can't stop thinking about it"). Another sign is elation. Ariane is happy, overflowing with energy, as if she were in a trance. Do not the words of amorous passion evoke "transport", "overflows", "ecstasy". Idealization is another hallmark of the state of love. The loved one is adorned with all the qualities, his faults erased, his positive points hypervalued (“he is brilliant!”, “She is adorable!”). They say love makes you blind. It is undoubtedly a little true: the feeling of love is not used to understand others but to live with them.

However, all is not wonderful during this passionate phase. Love also translates into withdrawal symptoms when the loved one is away. The slightest annoyance can also lead to a sudden fit of despair. The lover is worried, jealous, in permanent search of clues of the love of the other.

Types of love

Platonic love

The type of unrequited love is known as platonic love, it is that impossible love that remains as an idea or fantasy, its name comes from Plato, who maintained that love is perfect, sincere and disinterested and that it could not exist in the real world, so it was considered only as an ideal or unattainable.

Love at first sight

Love, at first sight, is one that occurs immediately, this is due to the attraction between two people who idealize themselves as a couple immediately after meeting, this includes the stereotype that we have marked as the ideal couple and with whom we identify.

The true love

This is the affection that is felt for another person in a disinterested way, this is a concept deeply rooted in romanticism, this type of love can feel like filial love, also as a pure feeling and without commitments, it is given sincerely and without waiting for nothing in return.

Clandestine love

This is the type of love that you have for another person when it is prohibited, when the couple cannot be united except by mutual feeling, but still, they insist on maintaining a relationship secretly to satisfy their love and companionship needs. The most famous example of clandestine love is that of Romeo and Juliet, since their families did not allow them to be together.

Distance love

Long-distance love is one that is maintained between two people who, although they are physically separated or living in different places, maintain a relationship as a couple, this type of love has existed since ancient times but has become more established in recent times due to the boom and development of telecommunications.

Unconditional love

Unconditional love is one that feels for another person regardless of the situations or conditions that may arise. This is characterized by giving himself without expecting anything in return; it is pure and sincere love, as an example; in religion, it is the love of God, but there is also filial love, as pure and disinterested love like that a mother has for her child.

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Example of love

The most beautiful example of love is the one we can give ourselves. If we love ourselves as we are, we can love others in the same way as ourselves.


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